As I start to reflect on this year, self love is the word I walk away with. Before this year, I never used it. Never thought about it. Thought of it as selfish.
Why is that?
The more this year progressed and I worked on getting out of my postpartum “awakening” (I thought I had postpartum depression but it wasn’t and my therapist gave it this name so it stuck and it sounds way better!), I learned I control my own happiness. I control my own outcome. It was only up to me to figure out what my happiness is.
I started on a road of self care and at first it felt all wrong.
How could I do things for myself?
I just had my second baby and a toddler and a husband to be there for and take care of. And then I thought how could I not? I was doing this self care for them. If I didn’t start taking care of me, I knew my postpartum awakening was going to get much worse.
So, I listened.
I started off slow. Listening to podcast about self love and self care. Then reading books about it. Then making appointments with myself. Sometimes that would consist of getting my nails done, or getting a pumpkin spice latte, or just writing in a journal or my blog.
It evolved when I took a leap and invested in myself. It was scary and bad ass at the same time.
I signed up for a coaching program to help me understand what was next for me.
At this time, I realized Beachbody coaching wasn’t going to work for me as a full time career. I still wanted to help others and be accountable but the time it was taking away from my family was not worth it. I’m still a coach and always available to help but I don’t put the demands of making rank or hitting Beachbody’s goals.
All that said, I still felt like something was missing. That I had more to give to others. And that’s where this coaching program came in. It opened my eyes to knowing I can still be a coach but at a different level and still help others get results they want. It also taught me about self love.
Now self love is a part of my daily routine. It’s in the workouts I do, my 5 minute meditation, making time for myself at least 30 minutes a day, or doing something for myself like getting my nails done or buying something small for myself that makes me smile (like a bottle of nail polish, a new journal, or a cute mug).
I find that when I make time for myself or do something that makes me happy, I’m all around a better person. I can be there more for my family and friends. I’m more focused, my creativity comes through and I’m happier
So, why did I and most people feel self love is selfish?
Maybe because if you google self love synonyms you find:
Or is it because our society feels the more you do for others, the better person you are? I’m not saying don’t do things for others, but why can’t you count as one of the others you are doing something for? You deserve it just as much as your friends and family do. So why aren’t we good to ourselves?
What I have found this year is that self love is not selfish, it’s actually selfLESS. It’s selfless to want to take care of yourself to be the best version you can be for those you love. Sometimes, it just takes 5 minutes to reboot so you can be 100% present.
Self love was my commitment this year and will continue to be a commitment each year. Will it be one of your commitments for 2017? Share below how you are going to love yourself in the new year!
Till next time…Sparkle on!
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